[deleted by user]

400
u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 19:52:43 2024 UTC
(130 comments)

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all 130 comments



400
u/Top_Ad_2090
Fri Apr 12 20:26:03 2024 UTC
(17 children)

So you’re going to be okay? Rumer was already on my “Under No Circumstances, Even if Hell Freezes Over”list but I think that’ll be in bold print, italicized, and underlined now. So sorry you had to deal with this, love.

102
Fri Apr 12 21:28:44 2024 UTC
(15 children)

I’m out of the loop, who is rumer?

324
Fri Apr 12 21:34:40 2024 UTC
(13 children)

I wish people learned about rumer the second they signed up to begin hormone therapy. Shes a notorious wackjob doctor who has her staff post positive reviews for her everywhere, meanwhile shes constantly botching surgeries left and right. People should know about her IMMEDIATELY if they ever consider bottom surgery.

95
Fri Apr 12 21:39:59 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Oh my god that’s horrible 😰 thanks for the heads up

21
Sat Apr 13 04:29:26 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Just search for her name in this sub or in the wiki

39
Fri Apr 12 21:51:15 2024 UTC
(5 children)

Do you know where she’s located?

102
Fri Apr 12 22:09:57 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Pennsylvania, I believe (Ardmore). You can look her up - just don't believe any of the lies on her sites, social media, or elsewhere that provide glowing reviews.

26
Fri Apr 12 22:27:18 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Gotcha, thanks for the reply!

39
Sat Apr 13 03:11:47 2024 UTC
(1 child)

She's in eastern Pennsylvania, close to Philadelphia. She's one of the few doctors that takes insurance and is in-state for me, but I would pay 100% OOP before going to her for bottom or top surgery.

7
Sat Apr 13 20:06:36 2024 UTC
(0 children)

As a Pennsylvanian as well, I'm definitely staying away from this "doctor" good lord

29
Sat Apr 13 06:04:41 2024 UTC
(0 children)

She's the Butcher of Ardmore, which is near Philadelphia.

34
Sat Apr 13 02:03:33 2024 UTC
(2 children)

I've seen from a few places that she threatens litigation over poor reviews and posts like OP's, too.

6
Sat Apr 13 19:17:54 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Keep the review truthful and factual, and threats of lawsuits are empty threats.

3
Sun Apr 14 01:39:32 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Most lawsuits are empty threats, too.

29
Sat Apr 13 02:50:20 2024 UTC
(0 children)

So as a general rule always let any trans person in Pennsylvania know that:

Dr Cat Rumor is out to absolutely destroy pussy like Luka Magnotta

While humor may be inappropriate here- and I feel for OP and hope for a speedy recovery -

I don't think anyone can get a cease and desist for what was just said due to coincidental phonetically similar name and we need a way to talk about these individuals. Turning them into a meme is a tried and true method.

Alternatives

Dr Cat Ruiner Dr Pussy Ruiner

Also is there a full list of these dangerous and harmful surgeons - hopefully with equally pun worthy names? I'd like to have a list around for the safety of friends and partners

3
Sat Apr 13 20:52:03 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Why is she still practicing??? She needs to be shut down. This isn’t okay!!!

3
Sat Apr 13 23:57:22 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Does any such "Under No Circumstances, Even if Hell Freezes Over" list actually exist? (I mean as an actual physical list that other people can read, not just a mental list). Because I would be very interested in seeing a list of "blacklisted" surgeons in case I decide to have any more transition surgeries in the future.

142
u/ReddishCherry
Fri Apr 12 20:38:45 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thanks for going to the hospital and keeping every part disinfected and clean. Follow their instructions and do not go to the surgeon. Keep ER informed and any changes to situation that calls for er don’t hesitate! It looks like a long arduous process but one step at a time and keeping safe and healthy is the first step! We are all following up your posts.

116
u/Forward_Storage_4735
Fri Apr 12 22:38:43 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Medical malpractice anyone?!......

45
u/dovelily
Fri Apr 12 20:38:26 2024 UTC
(3 children)

Been so worried for you so this is definitely a positive update. What are your next steps? Will it all heal up naturally do they think or are you looking for revision work?

Again, so so thankful you're okay. Strength and courage to you.

40
Sat Apr 13 01:20:03 2024 UTC
(2 children)

They don't know how it will heal. I don't have much hope for any kind of labia though. I'm not sure if i want a revision... I think my body has been through enough.

13
Sat Apr 13 09:35:47 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Stay strong and keep your options open. Everything will be okay in the end. We are all rooting for you.

167
u/Coldwake2220
Fri Apr 12 20:52:09 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Hi OP. There are a lot of people that are hoping the best for you. We want to see you recover. First and foremost, your well being is of utmost importance. We may be strangers, but we have complete empathy for you and want to see you be in a better place. Please don't get down on yourself. It will get better. Try not to dwell too much on the negative. There are a lot of us that want to send positive feelings and support.

You are not alone. People are following your progress and wishing you a full recovery. There are many healthcare professionals out there that can assist in getting you to a desired outcome. Resources and expertise are available. Even the best surgeons can have results that have setbacks and complications. Revisions are common.

Things will get better. You will get to a point where you will be fully recovered and healed up. Hang in there. We're rooting for you and want you to have the outcome you desire. You will get there. It's one step at a time. A positive outcome is absolutely attainable.

7
Sat Apr 13 12:21:05 2024 UTC
(0 children)

This is not up voted enough! My heart goes out to OP. I wish we could do more, Go Fund Me or something to help with the costs of a correction?!

I've seen many results, none as disheartening as these. Rumer is dangerous to our community and should have her license revoked.

84
u/Apart_Treacle
Fri Apr 12 20:20:30 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I've been worried ever since I saw your previous post. So glad you got some help. Hoping for best recovery and then hopefully you could get a revision if you are unhappy with the aesthetics. (after healing I mean)

26
u/mononoke_princessa
Fri Apr 12 23:00:21 2024 UTC
(2 children)

Are you getting restitched? Or? How on earth do you heal that?

30
Sat Apr 13 04:04:56 2024 UTC
(0 children)

At this point, it's probably going to have to be healed inside-out. When surgical sites have complications like this, it's usually best practice for wound care to not try stitching things back and instead leave things open to allow discharge and fluids to weep out and healing to start deep and move its way outwards.

I'm glad you have doctors helping you now, OP. I wish you as smooth a healing journey as possible from here on out!

19
Sat Apr 13 01:17:15 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Lots of silver products and gauze

17
u/Whereismyownname
Fri Apr 12 21:39:41 2024 UTC
(3 children)

How are you feeling right now? It looked like it must've hurt like hell.

21
Sat Apr 13 01:11:18 2024 UTC
(2 children)

Doesnt feel great I can tell you that.

9
Sat Apr 13 01:30:41 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Just tend your wounds and rest up for a while... god only knows what you been through.

31
u/Aggravating_Soil3970
Fri Apr 12 20:39:19 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I'm so sorry sister. You're a very bold woman to go through all of that, sending you love and hugs. ❤️❤️❤️

15
u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 22:07:25 2024 UTC
*
(0 children)

I'm glad you're getting qualified help. I'm not at all surprised to hear you have some necrosis (and it would have advanced without intervention). That was my primary concern from your presentation yesterday. Pretty scary stuff.

It may still get worse before it gets better, so please stay on top of seeing a REAL specialist. That's beyond "complications".

27
u/Squidjibblets420
Fri Apr 12 20:01:22 2024 UTC
(8 children)

did you not go to the hospital?

108
Fri Apr 12 20:10:12 2024 UTC
(7 children)

I went to an OBGYN trained in gender affirming care. Her team assessed the damages and took very good care of me. It has been cleaned and we were given instructions and resources on how to keep the wound clean and help it heal.

82
Fri Apr 12 20:11:18 2024 UTC
(5 children)

thank god. i’ve been stressing about this all night ngl lol

70
Fri Apr 12 20:12:23 2024 UTC
(3 children)

Thanks for worrying about me!

85
Fri Apr 12 20:17:16 2024 UTC
(0 children)

i think all of us were girlypop

25
Fri Apr 12 22:30:02 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Can confirm- we were all worrying about this all night. So glad you got some good care!

1
Sat Apr 13 16:14:54 2024 UTC
(0 children)

We were all worrying about you with bated breath, it was worrying why you couldn't go to the hospital, but in the end every thing worked out the best any of us could have hoped for.

1
Sat Apr 13 16:13:37 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Me to Ive been hoping for a positive update

15
Fri Apr 12 20:39:38 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Well done and thanks to Obgyn

22
u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 20:25:25 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thanks for the update, I was wondering about how it was going. It sounds like you have a good support network and in good hands. I'm sorry that you are going through this and I hope it gets easier and comfortable for you.

11
u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 21:46:41 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thank you for the update, wishing you a fast recovery. We all love you and care 🥺 I realize this is a difficult time.

10
u/tranifestations
Fri Apr 12 22:34:55 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thanks so much for this update- had you on my mind all night. So happy to hear you’re in good hands now that will help this heal properly. You deserve a big rest tonight- hope you get to do something to treat yourself for all you’re going through.

8
u/omgwtf_throwaway
Fri Apr 12 21:09:22 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Hope your pain levels are low and you heal quickly!

6
u/MischiefThePony
Fri Apr 12 22:15:33 2024 UTC
(0 children)

While that still looks incredibly painful, I am so happy that you found someone competent to address the issues. Follow all of their directions, get as much rest as you can, and if *anything* starts to feel off or you get a fever get back to the doctor as soon as you can. Now that things are being treated correctly hopefully your body will heal up quickly and you can move ahead.

Best wishes for continued recovery, healing, and peace. 💜💜

7
u/bigmacaroni69
Fri Apr 12 22:48:43 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I wish any of us online could do more aside from saying we all obviously hope you get well and heal well. Please prioritize yourself. All the love and healing in the world. 💗

7
u/Sleep-Foreign
Fri Apr 12 22:51:04 2024 UTC
(0 children)

was worried about you all night! so glad that you have a plan in place for healing! 💘

5
u/TravelerJack95
Fri Apr 12 23:46:04 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I also don’t understand how she’s still in practice, I hope you get better and please try to sue her for this!

5
u/ale6898
Sat Apr 13 01:34:05 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Sending you warm wishes & healing. This seems traumatic, I’m so sorry

6
u/slutty_princessxxx
Sat Apr 13 13:50:30 2024 UTC
(0 children)

If I was you, I would message everyone you can who Rumer did surgery on , get them all together ( even just in a group chat and you all should take that dr to court for everything she is worth. Leave her nothing.

u/[deleted]
Sat Apr 13 02:55:28 2024 UTC
(4 children)

[deleted]

15
Sat Apr 13 05:14:03 2024 UTC
(2 children)

Because not everyone uses reddit sadly. Rumer is still roping in patients through out of state medicaid and Transhealthcare.org

7
Sat Apr 13 06:48:09 2024 UTC
(1 child)

I am not on Medicaid but medi-cal. This is why I am scared to go to the surgeons that accept my insurance. I am scared that there will be large issues due to the person not caring or from them not working on trans patients. (I'm a brother not a sister) Same with top. I'm scared that the surgeons that'll cover top for me (I want anchor for personal reasons) will mess things up.

I really don't trust the surgeons that accept state provided healthcare.

1
Sat Apr 13 19:58:56 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Mods how is this not breaking rule number. ^ but my comment is.

4
u/MsAlexandria75
Fri Apr 12 23:26:42 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Omg girl.. my heart for you.

5
u/Priredacc
Sat Apr 13 21:02:14 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Maybe I shouldn't say what I'm about to say, but I'm both glad and impressed at the same time about the fact you're taking it so well and in such a calm and stoic way.

I'd be freaking out, panicking and almost unable to be functional. It looks so gruesome to me...

I'm so sorry this has happened to you and you have to deal with it. Stay strong and rest a lot so it can heal quickly.

Best wishes.

4
u/Glass_Accountant2189
Sun Apr 14 08:24:03 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Please go public with this. Rummer has harmed so many. This has to end. She has to stop. I cried after seeing your post.

6
u/__sophie_hart__
Sat Apr 13 02:48:48 2024 UTC
(0 children)

All I have to say is holy fuck you got butchered. I’d be balling my eyes out if this happened to me. Freaks me out some. This is what freaks me out that there isn’t a lot of info on the Kaiser Nor Cal SRS surgeons.Thing is I really don’t have the money to go anywhere else. I mean hopefully since I want minimal depth that means there should be less chance of complications.

3
u/KhaimeraFTW
Fri Apr 12 21:36:27 2024 UTC
(1 child)

So did you go to Dr Grimstad, and they helped out and got you the help you need? How was your interaction with her? I am sorry that you have had such a bad time since dr rumer.

3
u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 23:45:03 2024 UTC
(8 children)

When did it start to go bad ?

9
Sat Apr 13 01:15:11 2024 UTC
(3 children)

A few days ago a stitch came undone. As the day progressed the hole became bigger. The next morning both sides were undone.

3
Sat Apr 13 01:20:41 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Does it hurt you? What are you going to do ? Who was your surgeon.

I sympathize with you, girl... I got mine 1 month ago.

6
Sat Apr 13 03:26:47 2024 UTC
(0 children)

If you check her prev posts you'll see, I think the "surgeon" is named Rumer

0
Sat Apr 13 01:16:19 2024 UTC
(0 children)

What do you mean by undone ? How far are you post-op on the picture?

1
Sat Apr 13 20:01:31 2024 UTC
(3 children)

Once again mods. How is does my question differ from there’s? 🤔🤨

1
Sat Apr 13 20:02:15 2024 UTC
(2 children)

What happen ?

1
Sat Apr 13 20:03:24 2024 UTC
(1 child)

A mod commented on my question saying I’m violating rule 1. Which states nothing about how my question violates rule 1 and rule 1 has nothing to do with what I asked.

1
Sat Apr 13 20:04:27 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Weird...

3
u/leahcars
Sat Apr 13 00:06:13 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thankyou for the update and I'm very glad it's positive, wishing for a speedy recovery

3
u/Waa-Art
Sat Apr 13 01:36:25 2024 UTC
(0 children)

biggest hugs. For somebody with such complications, you sound extremely levelheaded.❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

3
u/nuggetboy01
Sat Apr 13 03:27:14 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I’m so sorry something so important turned out like this. Please heal well.

3
u/GETMONEYFUCKTHESYT3M
Sat Apr 13 13:48:21 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I am glad Dr Grimstad is taking good care of you. I worked with her team when I was in the process of getting my hysterectomy (FTM, post op phallo) and she was wonderful. They have a social worker that is a trans woman on their team as well (her name is Elizabeth). These kinds of complications are really hard emotionally, don’t hesitate to reach out to them for more support. Wishing you lots of good healing vibes.

3
u/kaitlynekuhn
Sun Apr 14 03:00:37 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Quite funny, that's exactly how my vagina looked like at the 2 week mark with Rumer. Everything heeled up nicely eventually somehow, but I have a lack there of any labia, even after labiaplasty.

3
u/leshpar
Sun Apr 14 03:17:42 2024 UTC
*
(2 children)

So they are just leaving it like that? What the actual fuck? Nope. Never going to this doctor. I am so sorry you've had this experience. This is seriously a worst case scenario and makes me worried for you.

6
Mon Apr 15 00:17:32 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Dr. Grimsted's team taught me how to clean and dress the wounds. Because there is no solid epithelial tissue along the vulva it cannot be stitched back together. It needs to be filled in with new tissue from the bottom up.

3
Mon Apr 15 05:24:51 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I'm so so sorry you have to go through this. This gives me nightmares. I'm glad you're sharing.

3
u/Suitable-Fix-9510
Sun Apr 14 04:15:20 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Sue. With absolutely no hesitation. Seen internal legal aid and make this fraud for everything she has and find yourself a surgeon who takes pride in their craft and human well being. This looks like a hate crime, not the work of a surgeon. This was an act of violence towards the transgender community and you were the means of displaying it. Start a go fund me to have this correct immediately.

5
Mon Apr 15 00:13:57 2024 UTC
(0 children)

If there is any indication this was anything more than a complication (as dehiscence, even internally, is a known complication in PI vaginoplasties) we will definitely sue. I am fortunate enough to have the financial resources for a lawsuit without need for crowd funding.

4
u/Responsible_Lion6596
Fri Apr 12 22:03:53 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Thank you so much for taking care of yourself. All of us are made better and stronger for each individual gender queer person in the world.

I hope you are able to navigate everything and that the obgyn can help you to achieve the best outcome possible.

u/[deleted]
Fri Apr 12 21:34:41 2024 UTC
(2 children)

[removed]

1
Fri Apr 12 22:20:13 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Rule 1. Be respectful to others, including identity and choices in surgery. Be polite and engage in civil discourse.

0
Sat Apr 13 19:54:53 2024 UTC
(0 children)

It's rude to ask for day one pictures after they shared photos already? Please explain where my question went wrong.

2
u/msdeezee cisgender partner
cisgender partner
Fri Apr 12 23:29:32 2024 UTC
(0 children)

So glad you were able to get some competent help! Is the doctor close to you so you can get back to see them if needed? It's probably kinda tough being in Maine, I imagine major medical centers may be few and far between.

2
u/TravelerJack95
Fri Apr 12 23:43:31 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I’m so sorry this happened to you, I hope everything heals up for you soon :(

2
u/prettigirlroses
Sat Apr 13 00:39:14 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Fearful I'm sorry

2
u/yukkobarfo
Sat Apr 13 03:51:34 2024 UTC
(0 children)

im so glad you got seen :) i’m so proud of you for going in!! you are so strong. it’s going to be okay, even if it’s hard now, we are all rooting so much for you <3

2
u/Soft_moon_light
Sat Apr 13 08:26:00 2024 UTC
(0 children)

You’re so strong, you’ll get through this! We support you and I’m so happy you managed to get the help you need. Sending my love!

2
u/Gigi2189
Sat Apr 13 16:20:24 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Omg 😱 the surgeon who did this to you should lose his/her license to practice! I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope some how that this will heal! Please go see another surgeon if possible.

2
u/xXx_Lizzy_xXx
Sat Apr 13 17:44:11 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I'm so glad to hear that you ended up in good hands!!! Good luck!!

2
u/Unecessary-Pen
Sat Apr 13 20:46:25 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I'm glad you got some answers, and hopefully able to resolve some of the issues, I had a few minor complications and I was freaking out, but everything for me healed really well, I could only imagine how stressful this had to be on you

2
u/Lichix
Sun Apr 14 00:50:57 2024 UTC
(0 children)

I'm really happy you're getting help from people that know you are valuable. Because YOU ARE. I send you all the strength in the world and I know you will get through this.

2
u/Avery1738
Sun Apr 14 02:21:59 2024 UTC
(1 child)

Did they close the wounds for you yet? Cause that should be what they should be focusing on the most at this point. I’m so sorry this happened to you. A lot of people get revisions, so don’t think that you’re different for having to get one or two revisions. I really hope you get scheduled for a revision very soon because I do not want there to be any more necrosis than you have already had, which should’ve been none. Rumer is a horrible surgeon, and it is not your fault for not knowing that. Stay safe and keep in contact with your revision surgeon! ❤️

5
Mon Apr 15 00:22:31 2024 UTC
(0 children)

My wounds are slowly healing! I'm not worried about the necrosis because it doesn't seem to be spreading. I'll post an update after my next visit with Dr. Grimsted.

Generally revisions aren't done until 6 months out. And at this moment I kinda don't want to go through another surgery and recovery period even if it would be shorter than this one. My boyfriend is very supportive and is giving me the confidence I need to make my own decisions about my body. I am very appreciative of him.

1
u/Confident-Amount-943
Sat Apr 13 01:44:43 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Honestly, I truly feel like a skin graft would be your best bet. It’s understating for sure if your not wanting a revision, but it’s not that bad. There’s enough to work with and I think if you find the right surgeon it can really be a pretty puss. I really hope the best for you ❤️❤️ and start a gofund me ! Look into dr.min jun or dr.banks personally I think they do art and sculpt them pussys outta clay and water just putting it out there 💋😂

1
u/SayFord
Sat Apr 13 20:26:01 2024 UTC
(0 children)

How it could get to this point omg

u/[deleted]
Sun Apr 14 13:40:52 2024 UTC
(1 child)

[removed]

1
u/mapelica
Sat Apr 13 13:25:39 2024 UTC
(1 child)

I have a question. Like how much does it hurt? Wish you the best and hope you heal fast.

4
Mon Apr 15 00:02:09 2024 UTC
(0 children)

It actually doesn't hurt at all. Everything is in proper order except for my labia. Although this doesn't mean I will forget what that witch put me through. That emotional pain will stay with me for a while.

u/[deleted]
Sat Apr 13 11:31:54 2024 UTC
(2 children)

[deleted]

10
Sat Apr 13 12:03:39 2024 UTC
(0 children)

this is an extremely insensitive comment to leave... pray nobody ever talks about your body this way.

1
Sat Apr 13 20:05:19 2024 UTC
(0 children)

Once again mods. How did I violate rule 1 but this did not. 🤨

1
u/Spiritual_Answer2507
Tue Apr 16 10:27:20 2024 UTC
(0 children)

That's the reason I am saying we need to make a list of all such doctors and black list them ASAP before any other person gets botched by them... We can't sue them or cancel their medical practice license but at least.. Blacklist them!!!!