Failed to dilate, vagina almost closed

39
u/[deleted]
Fri Aug 24 17:01:45 2018 UTC
(40 comments)

Hello folks. I wanted to see if any of you might have any advice for me. I completely fucked up. I'm around 9 months post op but I stopped dilating for a while. There are a host of reasons, but in the end it's irrelevant.

I saw my surgeon this past week and she said that my vagina is almost completely closed up. According to her she could barely get her pinky finger in. She told me I need another surgery using an abdominal skin graft to recreate the vagina again.

Is she right that I'm completely screwed or is there anything you all think I could do, given that the vagina isn't 100% closed yet?

all 40 comments


37
u/nesterbation
Fri Aug 24 17:21:01 2018 UTC
(15 children)

I assume your doctor knows better than Reddit, but I suspect there's no harm in trying to stretch things out again.

It could be possible to slowly work back up to your smallest dilator and so on and so forth.

14
Fri Aug 24 17:23:10 2018 UTC
(14 children)

That's what I was wondering, if it could be successfully stretched back out. She was a bitch to me about it and I didn't have time to ask her much of anything before she left the room and that was that.

So I wondered if there was an alternative to handing her another big pile of money to fix this.

14
Fri Aug 24 17:45:32 2018 UTC
(0 children)

My experience is that the ring of scar tissue that constitutes the opening of the vaginal canal is what closes up.

So if you can stretch it open, you should be ok. I've never lost much depth, it's always been girth/diameter.

11
Fri Aug 24 20:37:25 2018 UTC
(9 children)

At the very least you need a better doctor.

10
Fri Aug 24 20:39:25 2018 UTC
(8 children)

Very true. She was great until after surgery.

11
Sat Aug 25 05:49:40 2018 UTC
*
(7 children)

This seems to be a common theme of late. That and patient blaming.

7
Sat Aug 25 05:59:19 2018 UTC
(6 children)

Yep. Her office staff is also horrible to deal with. Bad experience all around.

3
Sat Aug 25 06:49:57 2018 UTC
(5 children)

How was the hospital staff and care?

1
Sat Aug 25 15:33:14 2018 UTC
(4 children)

Absolutely fantastic.

7
Sat Aug 25 17:01:12 2018 UTC
(3 children)

Were they specifically WPATH trained? This is still a point of contention for me. My hospital stay turned into a nightmare because they they moved me from the ICU where they had all the trained staff for GCS patients to a random room on another floor where they weren't familiar with the surgery and for most of the care staff I was their first trans patient. Then to top it all off, they provided and English Second Language nurse who I struggled to understand.

Unfortunately, it was way worse than it even sounds.

5
Sat Aug 25 17:12:14 2018 UTC
(2 children)

I really have no idea. I don't remember much specifically about the hospital. I was high as shit.

child comments hidden
5
Sat Aug 25 17:25:14 2018 UTC
(2 children)

Did she tell you what kind graft she would use to remake the Vulva canal?

3
Sat Aug 25 17:25:42 2018 UTC
(1 child)

Abdominal

8
Sat Aug 25 17:48:40 2018 UTC
(0 children)

My concern with her using Peritoneal tissue would be how many times she's done it before? I still feel like I got used as a guinea pig the first time around.

26
u/whiletruedosleep
Fri Aug 24 18:05:26 2018 UTC
(7 children)

I would order some of the smaller dilators from Soul Source, and a Hitachi Magic Wand. Use plenty of lube, and put the head of the Hitachi on the end of the dilator as you keep firm pressure pushing it in as you're comfortable. The vibration will go through the entire dilator and really help loosen those pelvic muscles. Re-lube as much as you need to.

I would definitely try that for a while before going back to surgery. Start dilating as often as you can and moving up in size as you are comfortable.

12
Fri Aug 24 21:07:46 2018 UTC
*
(0 children)

Thanks! I just ordered Soul Source's smallest GRS dilator.

Edit: and the wand.

8
Sat Aug 25 01:51:43 2018 UTC
(2 children)

This worked for me too when things were really tight from scar tissue before my revision. I also switched to a soft tapered silicone dilator (sex toy) for girth and the small orange SS dilator for depth. The vibrator/wand helps diffuse the pain.

I had all kinds of problems with scar tissue. The only thing that was going to fix it was removal via surgery.

1
Tue Dec 28 14:12:52 2021 UTC
(1 child)

What is tapered/taper? A special shape or material?

Ooh it's conical! My bad. Hope you're doing well Emma.

2
Tue Dec 28 14:42:30 2021 UTC
(0 children)

Yes, in this case it was small at the tip and gut wider at the base.

8
Sat Aug 25 00:58:41 2018 UTC
(2 children)

I've never heard of this before. Have you done this yourself?

12
Sat Aug 25 02:11:07 2018 UTC
(0 children)

Not OP, but I use my wand like this for dilating. It makes thing a lot easier and definitely goes wider and deeper.

9
Sat Aug 25 11:40:58 2018 UTC
(0 children)

Yep, there have been times where I couldn’t dilate for a few days and this helps a lot. I have never gone without dilating to the point that OP is at, but it is absolutely worth trying.

I would not recommend this while there is still any concern of sutures tearing etc, but months after surgery should be fine.

14
u/six_inches_lighter
Fri Aug 24 20:20:22 2018 UTC
(7 children)

This happened to me too (even stopped dilating around the same time as you). My doctor made the same comment about barely fitting her finger past the scar tissue and how it made it difficult to examine me so I started dilating again and I got my girth back, but I only have 2.5” of depth.

So in my experience: regaining depth, no; regaining girth, yes. Hopefully you’re able to do the same.

8
Sat Aug 25 02:12:53 2018 UTC
(3 children)

I know someone else who experienced the same exact thing. It makes me wonder if the people describing the issues on this thread are related by surgeon. The only consistency seems to be it's a "her". That certainly limits the field down to 3 or 4 surgeons. I had a disastrous problem related to scar tissue build up, it was torture for months on end. You can read my post history if you want more details. It might be worth your time.

7
Sat Aug 25 02:48:47 2018 UTC
(2 children)

I’ve posted quite a bit about my issues as well. He’s “the Canadian surgeon”.

3
Sat Aug 25 03:18:59 2018 UTC
(1 child)

I'll take the letter "B" please for the win. What other initials do we have? Anyone?

Do I hear a "K"?

5
Sat Aug 25 04:12:23 2018 UTC
(0 children)

R for me.

4
Fri Aug 24 20:37:22 2018 UTC
(2 children)

Thank you for your feedback! If you're comfortable answering, how is sex? (If you do penetrative sex, that is)

3
Sat Aug 25 01:29:21 2018 UTC
(1 child)

It’s too shallow for penetrative sex so unless I’m in control it tends to be uncomfortable. Masturbation with a dildo feels amazing though.

1
Sat Aug 25 04:10:15 2018 UTC
(0 children)

Awesome. That gives me hope to still have some fun.

6
u/HiddenStill
Sat Aug 25 04:14:37 2018 UTC
(5 children)

For the benefit of others in the future would you mind adding a few details.

Did you dilate properly to start with, and at what point in time did you stop? How many months have you been stopped? Did you stop suddenly, or did it just start getting harder until you gave up?

4
Sat Aug 25 05:58:37 2018 UTC
(2 children)

I did dilate properly to start with. I stopped around month 6 for about 3 months, up to where we are now. I stopped pretty suddenly.

4
Sat Aug 25 06:17:09 2018 UTC
(1 child)

Wow, 6 months is not even that early or for long. It goes to to show just how important it is to dilate. I hope you manage to recover the situation.

Its always said that depth is difficult to recover, and width can be done anytime. Not sure how true this is, but I have heard that if you use a very narrow dilator you need to be careful not to injure yourself with it by pushing too hard - i.e. its kind of sharp.

For width I'd look into Suporn's dynamic dilation technique. Suporn uses it because his recovery is more difficult than normal penile inversion, and you might benefit from it.

Worst case you can definitely fix it with another surgery, but you'd want to be sure whatever problem you had this time didn't occur again. Colon-vaginoplasty is used in these cases. It's more specialized and I'd be very careful which surgeon you choose if you do this.

5
Sun Aug 26 11:56:10 2018 UTC
(0 children)

Month 6 is still pretty early. People would be dilating 1-2 times a day, she stopped for three months.

4
Sat Aug 25 05:47:51 2018 UTC
(1 child)

Those are great details to have. Good questions.

I know in my case the scar tissue buildup caused hypergranulation lasting for 2 months. Once that scar tissue builds up it thickens. Then you end up tearing it trying to increase the dilation with causes more granulation and scar tissue. You basically have to reduce the dilator to the smallest size that will prevent that cycle without stopping completely. You can't Silver Nitrate your way out of this. Too much of that will create even more problems. Then you have to let it all heal. From there you have to deal with the outcome of that situation.

I'm like the Goddam poster-child of, Don't let this happen to you! LOL!

1
Wed Nov 1 08:44:51 2023 UTC
(0 children)

I'm having this issue right now... How did you get out of this cycle? I currently can't even fit my index finger every time... There's so much scarring inside and I didn't ever stop dilating... It just went from Soul Source dilator 2-3 at the start all the way up to the largest one and then down to Soul Source 1 about a month ago (almost 6 months postop) and since last saturday even that one doesn't fit anymore...

u/[deleted]
Fri Aug 24 21:41:10 2018 UTC
(2 children)

[deleted]

8
Sat Aug 25 05:57:01 2018 UTC
(1 child)

Rumer is spot on. I stopped from about month 6 to 9.

1
u/Ivanna_is_Musical
Tue Dec 28 14:10:39 2021 UTC
(0 children)

Hi, it's supposed we can maintain the canal not closing by putting a soft pack with gauzes inside a condom. I don't know how to put it to full depth but it helps average diameter to keep NOT CLOSING. Better"something" inside, than nothing, whole the body fights to close it up! And it happens sooner than you feel ;( Hop you recover your canal dear! Lesson learned.

Updstes on this please?