I am now three weeks post-op after getting PPT vaginoplasty with Dr. Wittenberg, and am preparing to go back home this. So, I figured I'd share some reflections that I've had over the past few weeks. . My goal is to include some information that I haven't read on this sub yet (though I may have just missed it). I believe that emotionally preparing for this surgery is very important, and so I will point out certain things that I think it is helpful to be prepared for. A couple of things before I begin:

• I have a fairly high pain tolerance. If you don't, some of this advice might not apply to you.
• I'm still pretty early into recovery, and my thoughts might change over time.
• Your mileage may vary in general.

Bolster/First Week after Hospital Discharge

Part of Dr. Wittenberg's technique is that she leaves a bolster sown over your vagina after surgery until your first post-op visit. As other people have pointed out, this may be part of why Dr. Wittenberg's technique is one step and is able to get such consistent results.

With that said, the bolster sucks. It is sown into your skin, and it essentially ties your legs together. This seriously limits your mobility while wearing it, makes using the restroom more difficult and painful, and it stinks (there is some sort of liquid in the gauze that I couldn't stand the smell of). It also means that you have to go over a week before you can see the results of the surgery for the first time. This part sucked more than I realized it would - by the end of the week, I started getting anxious that something was going wrong under the bolster, and that I wouldn't even be able to tell until the first post-op appointment. If you're preparing for surgery with Dr. Wittenberg, I'd recommend thinking about how this will effect you for the first week.

This, along with drugs and other mental effects of surgery, will mean that you will have to rely on your caregivers for so many things, from getting you water to keeping track of medicine to potentially helping you use the bathroom. Make sure that you bring along someone who you are comfortable with and who you trust, if you can. It will also mean that this is the week with the heaviest bedrest. Especially if you're staying at someone else's home, think of ways to keep yourself entertained, to make sure that you can eat in bed, etc.

Dilation

After the first week of surgery and when the bolster is removed, you get to see your results for the first time and you start dilating. I started with an initial depth of ~16 cm (yay!!), and I have not lost any depth yet. From how my experiences match up with what I have read about dilation for those who got the PI technique, there are a few ways that dilating after PPT is different (though this could do more with how my body has healed. Again, YMMV!).

First, there was very little pain or blood from dilation from the very beginning. The only pain I have ever experienced from dilation so far was from the outside of my vagina for the first few days. I have not felt any pain from the inside of my vagina. Others have suggested that the actual PPT portion of the surgery heals a bit faster than the rest of the of the vulva, and that matches up with my experiences, though I'm not sure how accurate that is generally.

Second, when dilating, it usually takes a bit of time to get to full depth. When I first insert the dilator, I feel the sensation that I've reached the end of my vagina at least 4-5 cm before the depth that I got during my initial dilation and where I can generally achieve overall. Once I get that feeling, I have to apply firm (but not painful or pushing) pressure for a minute or two to open the last few centimeters back up. I won't stop paying attention to do something else or start my timer until I get to at least the first notch on the bottom of the soul source dilator. I know that a lot of people tend to lose depth with PPT. I don't know if the way that I've been going about dilating has been helping not to lose depth or it just hasn't been long enough to lose depth yet, but I figured I'd share it with you all either way.

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Second and Third Week General Reflections

For the most part, I've found the second and third weeks easier than the first week. I don't really don't have a lot to say here that hasn't been said, I think. There is a ton of swelling to deal with in the first week, though. If you're not used to swelling pains, it sucks a little bit. It's one of those things that you can just constantly feel, and it makes walking and finding a comfortable position to lay in difficult. The swelling steadily decreased over the week though (ice helps, folks), and it doesn't having the feeling that it's swollen much anymore (though it definitely still is).

Part of the struggle of these two weeks is just how unknown everything is. There are stitches everywhere, there are weird pains that are hard to identify because all the nerves are freaked out, and nothing is quite in the right place yet. It can sometimes be hard to convince yourself that what you're looking at isn't indicative the final result (for me, one the consistent worries that I've had is that my clitoris won't set properly under the clitoral hood). Also, I keep having weird pains while peeing because I'm not used to using the muscles in the same way anymore.

That said, for me, mobility has drastically increased these two weeks. I can get out of bed more often, shower, go downstairs every once in a while, etc. I recently started being able to sit again without discomfort. Also, mental clarity completely returned to normal at the beginning of the second week. All of that helps immensely with feeling more normal again ime.

Closing/Other Thoughts

There are two real thoughts that I have to close off with:

First, I think it's hard to state exactly how it feels to wake up and realize that this surgery is permanent and that it will take a long time to heal. I don't regret the permanency of the surgery by any means, but there is something a little overwhelming that you can't go back on the pain, the recovery, or the surgery itself to some degree. I think it's important before surgery to think about how long things will be healing for. The area will constantly hurt for some time, whether that is a slight annoyance or severe pain. It can take three full months for the majority of the swelling to go down, and there will still be some swelling left even then. It can also take three months or more for the stitches to dissolve or push their way out. Even after all of that, some people don't feel much in their clitoris for several months after surgery. Be prepared for the long game here. Be ready to wait a long time to see a "final" result.

With that said, I'm already so happy that I decided to go through with this surgery. Especially now that swelling has started to go back down, it just feels so great to look in the mirror or shower and not see something dangling between my legs. I almost cried the first time that I saw what it's like to be flat between my legs and when I tried on pants again for the first time. For me, it really has been worth every second and every dime. If you have bottom dysphoria, it is so hard to describe what it's like for most of that to dissipate (YMMV. I still do experience some bottom dysphoria, and I don't know when/if that will go away). After going through all of this, it is so easy to see why this is a life saving and medically necessary surgery. I hope that the rhetoric otherwise won't dissuade you from getting it on your own.

Feel free to post below or DM if you have any questions! :)

Edit: Thanks for the gold, friend!