Hello once again reddit, I'm here to try and talk about things now that my revision has been completed. I discussed why this was happening a while back and you can link back to my original surgery reactions and such through there.

Anyway, I'm going to start this off by being blunt: I still hate how everything looks. The revision helped slightly but not enough to make a serious change I can enjoy.

You can see pictures of things here .

Suffice it to say, I hate how everything looks when my legs open up. My lower labia just plain vanishes. Now, I've had sex with lots of cis ladies and a few trans ones too, but I've never seen results that came out like this.

Frankly, I'm disappointed. I likely have more dysphoria now than I had before surgery. I have such little depth I can barely even use my neovagina anyway, even after this revision to try and make it so I'm actually wide enough at the entrance to do so.

I knew I wouldn't have as much skin to work with. Dr. Gast knew this too, I told her as much. However, she NEVER looked at my junk until the day of surgery.

I feel positive if she had I could have at least discussed zero-depth surgery as an option. Not only could it have saved me tons of time and thousands of dollars on electrolysis, but the healing could have been way easier. Oh, and what little skin I had could have been used to make something with good aesthetics that's way more sensitive overall.

Yes, I can have an orgasm now post-op. But the reality is I'd honestly be embarrassed to show myself to any partner who wasn't warned a lot in advance about how things look. I currently feel gross trying to figure out how to even manage sex in the future. I don't want people even looking at it, or to have to remind myself how I look by seeing it. Dilating is now hell because that damn mirror stares back at me every day.

I don't know if I'll really have an update post after this. Followup with Dr. Gast basically said "sorry, there's not really anything else we can do" so this is it. The scars will fade, but this is how I look.

Would I go to Dr. Gast or recommend her? She's managed some great results for other people and her team treated me well. However, the answer is no unless you can absolutely advocate for yourself and have a ton of knowledge going in.

I still think she could have helped me have a better turnout. Now I'm stuck with what I've got with literally no hopes of making it better. Barely three inches deep and I look like crap.